BY YOU

May 20, 2019 by Aspergers Girls 2 Comments

 

By you

I am gifted

I am gifted with seeing—the eyes of a seer pried open

I must look even when I wish to close

Myself

Clammed shut I hide, I run, I weep

In the corners where none could find

If I was different

But I am not

I am not

And thusly I am

This window into you

This cloaked hindrance wanting, needing

To hide

In the corner

These thoughts

Thoughts, which are, not mine

And I hurt, not for me, even as it feels of me

But for the thousand ones searching

Wanting, needing, dying

I hurt for the ones who cannot

Whilst I can

I remain in this world

To be that which is naught

Some carrier of broken dreams

Bringing light into the darkness brought

To me

This scattered, nothing girl

Who wavers back and forth between want and not want

Who is all at once here, and then, all at once gone

Into the corner

Hiding, craving to be less open

Less aware

Less filled with knowing

That is from somewhere beyond

As I am just a girl

Trapped between two worlds

Unprepared, yet prepared

Lost, yet guided

Broken and re-broken, until alas I have no choice

But to heal my wounds with words

Brought out of the corners

Where I hide

Where I remember

Where I long to be less alone

And remembered

As one, who has lost her way

In the wave of truths

Brought onto me

By you

5.20.19 Samantha Craft